Pastorale begeleiding van die self-mutileerder

Abstract

In hierdie artikel het  dit geblyk dat die toenemende voorkoms van self-mutilering onder jongmense in talle gevalle as uitlaatklep gedien het vir opgeboude druk en nie soseer as ‘n selfmoordpoging nie. Heel dikwels was dit ‘n uitvloeisel van mishandeling en/of seksuele misbruik en die persoon het  dan hierdie metode gebruik om van innerlike pyn ontslae te raak. Gevoelens van alleenheid, ‘n behoefte aan beheer, ‘n behoefte om net íéts te voel, asook ‘n behoefte om die self te straf, kon ook ‘n rol gespeel het. Die gesinsklimaat was oor die algemeen van besondere belang. Hierdie probleem het aan pastorale beraders en aan die kerk ‘n besondere uitdaging gebied deur onder andere veel meer op die probleem van pyn, asook die hantering daarvan te fokus. Dit het  verband gehou met die feit dat ontkenning in die verlede ‘n groot rol gespeel het in sekere kerklike kringe en ook binne sekere gesinne. As deel van ‘n pastoraal-terapeutiese strategie in die begeleiding van die self-mutileerder kon aspekte soos die identifisering van die rol van  leuens, die benutting van oplossings uit die verlede, vergifnis, nagmaal, gebed en meditasie gevolglik uiters belangrike komponente van die helingsproses gevorm het. Pastorale beraders sal hulleself ten volle op die hoogte moet bring van die verskynsel van self-mutilering ten einde in staat te wees om werklik te kan help.

Pastoral guidance for the self-mutilator. In this article it seemed that the increase in the occurrence of self-mutilation among young people in many cases served as a pressure-relief valve and not a suicide attempt as such.  It was very often the outcome of ill-treatment and/or sexual abuse and the person used this method to get rid of the inner pain. Feelings of aloneness, a need to be in control, a need to feel at least something and a need to punish the self could also have played a role. The family climate was generally very important. This provided a special challenge for pastoral counsellors as well as the church by, among others, focussing more on the problem of pain and how to handle it. This was relevant to the fact that denial had played a significant role in certain church circles as well as within some families. As part of the pastoral-therapeutic strategy in helping the self-mutilator, aspects such as identifying the role of lies, the use of solutions from the past, forgiveness, the Lord’s Supper, prayer, and meditation were therefore very important components in the healing process. Pastoral counsellors would have to be well informed about the phenomenon of self-mutilation in order to be able to be of real help.